Who Buys the Ketubah? 6 Things You Need to Know

Who Buys the Ketubah? 6 Things You Need to Know

Here’s a question I get a lot as the CEO of Ketubah.com: “Who buys the Ketubah?”

The person asking isn’t sure if the couple should buy it. Or is it a parent?

I wanted to answer this question in depth. And also show how modern technology makes the Ketubah tradition accessible for everyone.

Keep reading to learn:

• Who buys the Ketubah in 80% of cases 
• What Jewish tradition says (and what it doesn’t)
• How to buy a Ketubah if you’re not the one getting married (without upsetting anyone)

Does it Matter Who Buys the Ketubah?

There’s a lot of worry about doing the Ketubah “wrong.” Couples wonder if there’s a rule – or a bad omen – attached to whose credit card is used at checkout.

I’ve heard the odd horror story. I once heard a Rabbi reject a Ketubah and write a new one on a napkin at the wedding. But don’t worry! This happened because the Hebrew text was printed incorrectly (this can happen when buying a Ketubah on a site like Etsy!).

Did You Know? All Ketubah texts available at Ketubah.com have been written by Rabbis or Jewish scholars, and go through a detailed review process to guarantee correct printing in Hebrew.

But let’s answer the question a little more.

Short Answer: “No, it Doesn’t Matter”

The short answer is it doesn’t matter who buys the Ketubah. 

Whether it’s the couple, a parent, or a group of friends pooling resources, the validity of your Ketubah comes from the words and the witness signatures – not the bank account it came from. The officiant won’t pull out a napkin because grandma bought it. Your wedding will go ahead as planned.

However, for those who live within the framework of Halacha or traditional Jewish law, the answer is more complex.

More on this below.

6 Things to Know About Buying a Modern Ketubah

1. Tradition, Not Commandment 

I tell people that the “rules” we associate with Jewish weddings are better thought of as traditions. This is true for the Ketubah. There isn’t a commandment that says who should pull out the wallet.

Because there’s no “right” or “wrong” way, modern Ketubahs have become a universal symbol of commitment that can be celebrated by anyone – across different communities, languages, and even between faiths. Whether you’re observant or just looking to honor Jewish heritage and identity, the Ketubah is a welcome addition to your wedding.

2. The Groom’s Historic Role 

Now, it wasn’t always this way.

Historically, the Ketubah was a legal contract outlining the groom’s financial obligations to the bride. Because of this, tradition expects the groom or his family should purchase the ketubah.

This tradition remains important in Conservative and Orthodox Jewish weddings. Similarly, the Ketubah signing ceremony takes place in a male-only space. Then, the groom will hand the Ketubah to his beloved as a symbol of his commitment.

3. What Does Halacha Say? 

When you live within the framework of Halacha, the purchase of a Ketubah is tied to the legal validity of the marriage contract.

In these cases, it’s preferred that the groom performs the kinyan (the formal acquisition), which includes taking responsibility for the Ketubah itself. However, there is some flexibility.

Did You Know?: Around 12% of our sales at Ketubah.com are for Orthodox texts while 15% of purchases are for our Conservative Ketubah texts. Conservative Ketubahs are guided by Halacha but also include the Lieberman Clause, which simplifies the religious divorce process.

4. The 80/20 Reality Today 

Here’s an insight into who buys the Ketubah in modern Jewish weddings.

I asked my team to look into it. And from Ketubah.com purchases in 2025, we found that 80% of the time it’s the couple who purchase their own Ketubah. Mostly it’s the groom, but sometimes it’s the bride. The remaining 20% of purchases come from a family member or a group of friends.

So the tradition of the groom purchasing the Ketubah is still strong. But it’s not the only way to buy a modern Ketubah.

5. “Gifts of Approval” 

I see a lot of interfaith couples at Ketubah.com – they make up 40% of our customers! This is why we have a selection of interfaith Ketubah texts available.

Often, I’ll notice a Jewish parent or grandparent wants to buy the Ketubah as a kind of “gift of approval.” They’re thrilled the couple wants to include this Jewish tradition as part of their ceremony. So they offer to buy it.

For these situations, alongside interfaith Ketubah texts, we have a selection of LGBTQ+ Ketubah texts, non-binary Ketubah texts and Secular Humanist Ketubah texts.

6. One Rule We Recommend You Observe 

If there is one “rule” I insist on it’s this: No matter who is paying, the couple must choose the design and the text. 

The Ketubah is a document that will hang on your wall for the rest of your lives. It should speak to your style and your promises. The purchaser might be the benefactor, but the couple should always be the ones who decide on the final version.

Did You Know? At Ketubah.com, we create each Ketubah by hand. To make sure everything is perfect, we will always send a final “proof” for your approval before the piece is created. This ensures the couple (and their officiant) are 100% happy with every word and detail.

But there’s another reason. When you buy a Ketubah, you’ll need some important information to hand. This includes:

• The Ketubah text required
• The final design
• Names of the couples to be married
• Their Hebrew names
• Parents’ names
• Wedding date and time

What if You Want to Buy a Ketubah for the Couple Getting Married?

If you aren’t one of the beloveds about to be married, you might be asking how to handle the logistics. How do you pay for it without choosing a design they don’t like? What if you don’t know their Hebrew names?

At Ketubah.com, we’ve made this easy. You can be the benefactor while ensuring the couple stays in the driver’s seat. 

Here are two options for this scenario:

Option 1: Buy a Gift Card

A Ketubah gift card is the perfect solution for family and friends. We see this all the time – perhaps a grandmother wants to buy a Ketubah, or a group of friends wants to pool together for a gift.

It’s a wonderful way to cover the cost – while letting the couple have control over the design and the Ketubah Text they want. We offer gift cards ranging from $150 to $600, which can cover anything from a beautiful standard print to a high-end, intricate masterpiece.

Pro Tip: If you want to get a sense of what your gift will cover, you can browse our full range of Ketubahs here to see the different styles and price points available.

Option 2: Ask the Couple to Use Our Third-party Buyer Feature 

This is a feature we’re proud of because it solves a specific “modern wedding” problem. 

Sometimes, a parent or a “Third-Party Purchaser” wants to pay for the Ketubah, but they don’t have the answers to the technical questions we need. For example, the couple’s Hebrew names or the specific text the Rabbi requested.

Here is how it works:

1. The couple visits the site and chooses the design and text they love.
2. They fill out all the necessary personal and ceremony details themselves.
3. At checkout, they simply click the “Third-Party Payer” button.
4. The system generates a payment link that the couple emails to the purchaser.
5. The purchaser clicks the link, pays securely, and the couple is immediately notified to continue the process.

It’s seamless, secure, and ensures that the couple is still managing the sensitive details while the purchaser gets the joy of giving a gift that will last a lifetime.

Buying a Ketubah: The “What” Is More Important than the “Who”

At the end of the day, whether the credit card belongs to the groom, the couple, or a generous grandparent, the goal is the same: to create a lasting, beautiful symbol of your partnership. 

I wouldn’t want the logistics of “who pays” to overshadow the joy of having this amazing piece of Jewish heritage at your wedding.

The Ketubah tradition is yours whether you’re an interfaith couple, whether you live your life according to Halacha, or whether you just want to honor a beautiful Jewish tradition. The most important thing is that the Ketubah you choose is one you’ll be proud to look at every day.

For this reason the “what” – i.e. what text and what design you choose – is more important than “who” buys it.

Ready to find the piece that speaks to your story?